Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
Randomize
