ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
Randomize
