as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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