How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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