But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Randomize
