I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize
