Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Randomize
