Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
