i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
