as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
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