I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Randomize
