i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
