Pappa wants mamma naked
dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize
