So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
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