If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
Randomize