Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
Randomize
