i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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