he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
