I miss vodka workout Fridays
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
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