i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
