Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
Please save me from this creative non fiction class. I just wrote a paper about how I spend unhealthy amounts of time with my cat.
I spend unhealthy amounts of time watching RuPaul's Drag Race.
I referred to the cat as amicable.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
Randomize
