I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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