I wannas sexs uuuuu
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
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