Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
