I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
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