you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
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