i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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