Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
Randomize