i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
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