it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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