I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
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