summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
