I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
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