we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
I just blew my weed a kiss
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
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