I'm pants shitting drunk right now
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Randomize
