I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
No. Way more drunk than the night I put a snowball in my purse "for later" and woke up to find everything soaking the next day.
But less drunk than the day that Pete took four of your birth control pills thinking they were Advil, right?
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Randomize
