remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize
