Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Randomize
