so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
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