i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
The cabbie told me fat girls shouldn't wear tight clothes, and that he feels bad for the guys that have to be underneath them, especially because their positions are "very limited" and proceeded to ask me if I had a trash can and if I could throw something away for him. Don't worry though, he promised it wasn't anything "bad". He then handed me a tied up grocery bag with a bunch of wadded up Kleenex that weighed about 3 pounds. To answer your question, yes I made it home. Fml
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
i think i just lost a toe
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
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