Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize