So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
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