Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
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