You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
