yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
Randomize
