It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
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