i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
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