He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Randomize
