I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
Randomize
