Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
I won't apologize to a one balled man
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
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